London - HarperPress - 2010
Set in contemporary London
Plot Summary : Balthazar Jones is a Beefeater, or more correctly, a Yeoman Warder, at the Tower of London. He spends his days giving guided tours to flocks of tourists and looking out for pickpockets. His hobby is collecting rare raindrops which are kept in Egyptian perfume bottles in specially made cabinets.
Balthazar Jones Lives in the Salt Tower with his wife, Hebe Jones. Hebe works in the London Underground Lost Property Office and spends her days with her friend and colleague, Valerie Jennings, tryijg to reunite people with their lost belongings.
Balthazar and Hebe Jones had a young son, Milo, but he died some years ago, leaving a great wall of grief between his previously inseparable parents.
The last member of the household is Mrs Cook, the world's oldest tortoise, who has been in the family for several generations.
One day Balthazar Jones is approached by one of the Queen's equerries to take charge of a new menagerie at the Tower of London to house animals gifted to the Queen by foreign governments. There had been a menagerie at the Tower from the early 13th century until the 1830s and it is thought by the authorities that reopening the menagerie will result in increased visitors and revenue. As the owner of the world's oldest tortoise, Balthazar Jones is the obvious man for the job.
And so Balthazar Jones takes charge of a solitary, pining albatross, a group of Geoffroy's marmosets who expose their privates when stressed, a golden monkey called The Duchess of York, some toucans, a zorilla "a uniquely odorous black and white skunk-like animal from Africa", a sugar glider, a glutton, a komodo dragon, some crested water dragons (aka Jesus Christ lizards), a tiny Etruscan shrew, a pair of lovebirds who hate each other and have to be kept separate. The penguins get lost en route from London Zoo but some giraffes and a bearded pig end up in the Tower precincts instead, the latter having been smuggled in by Balthazar Jones.
Yes, all those creatures do exist!
Other characters include:
The Chief Yeoman Warder who thinks Balthazar Jones is slacking these days and no longer catching many pickpockets - The Chief Yeoman Warder is worried there'll be a repeat of the 1381 Peasant's Revolt. He is also haunted by the ghost of Sir Walter Raleigh who stomps about in the room below his bedroom, belching out great puffs of tobacco smoke.
Arthur Catnip - London Underground Ticket Inspector and admirer of Valerie Jennings.
- Rev. Septimus Drew - the unhappily single chaplain of the Tower of London who loves Ruby Dore, landlady of the Beefeater's pub, the Rack and Ruin. Rev. Septimus Drew pens erotic novels (under a female nom de plume) as well as sermons - the former are admired for their 'glinting chinks left open for the reader's imagination; strong moralistic tone . . . and her absolute conviction in the existence of true love.'
Review : It was the whimsical cover art which drew me to this book. A couple of reviews I read were less than enthusiastic but I found it lived up to the cover; it's a very charming, nutty, whimsical look at relationships with funny characters and plotlines abounding.
The wall of grief between Balthazar and Hebe is seen from both sides and there are some poignant passages that had me, as a mother, weeping. eg. p.291
"We might love each other in the same way," he said, "but it doesn't mean that we grieve in the same way."
Hebe Jones looked at him through a veil of tears. "It mkes me wonder whether he ever loved him."
Reginald Perkins held up a crooked finger. "Did you ever wonder whether he loved the boy when he was alive?" he asked.
"Never."
"There's your answer, luvvie," he said, lowering his hand.
Then I'd be laughing a page or more later. The lesser characters are just as fragile, warm and endearing.
There are lots of little bits of Tower history dropped in too - escapees, victims of the executioner, animals kept in the Tower over the years, the Princes in the Tower and you get a sense of the community that lives behind the walls of the Tower.
The Tower of London comes across as one of the characters in the book as much as the people and my only complaint is that I had to dig out a guide book we had bought on our visit there in 2006 so I could see where each of the places within the Tower was in relation to the others. A map might have been a nice addition.
It was a nice easy, relaxing read. I thoroughly enjoyed the quirky characters and their unusual lifestyles and recommend it highly.
Reviewed by : Alba
